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Grief and Tribulations

Adventures - Cookie Collage

We Lost Our Baby, Cookie!

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With extremely broken hearts, we regret to inform everyone that we have really horrible news … Thursday morning we woke up to finding our beautiful and amazing Cookies and Cream had passed away! We are ABSOLUTELY DEVASTATED! As it says in this video, “A Beautiful Girl Makes a Beautiful World!” And without her, our world is CRUSHED!

Cookie was only seven years old (almost eight), VERY well cared for with very healthy foods, herbs, minerals and vitamins. Her coat was shiny, appetite was good and she showed NO signs of any distraught whatsoever. In fact, we have cameras in their barn, so we can check them regularly and she was up at 10pm Wednesday night for her regular nighttime snack of fresh grass hay to help keep them warm. We are in absolute SHOCK and DESPAIR!

The vet came and reviewed all of her behaviors, foods, shelter, weather and did an exam. There were no apparent reasons, so we suspect she had a heart attack (which I am finding out can happen with no signs). Goats generally live until 8-14, so we had hoped she would make it to 14 like our JellyBean did. We cannot believe this happened!
 
We don’t have kids, so our girls are our babies! And I am very ill and homebound, so these girls are my children, best friends and my joy in life. In the face of my daily life of losses, unbearable pain and isolation, they have always been here for me to snuggle and literally wrap themselves around me with their complete and unwavering LOVE! Their desire to be with me and love me have given me reason to fight another day, so they would never experience losing their Mommy.
 
“The Adventures of Pumpkin and Cookie” has been the only thing left in my life that I could do from time to time. Posting photos, GIFS and videos gave me GREAT JOY and PURPOSE IN LIFE! … Now that’s GONE!
 
I don’t know how I will cope! But I do know that right now, I have to focus on my only purpose today and that is to comfort my precious, sweet, loving, one-in-a-million baby, Pumpkin and help her through this grief as much as I humanly can.
 
My husband Wayne and I have taken turns being with Pumpkin all during the day since Cookie passed, giving her love and helping her through her sheer loss. When the sun goes down, we sit with her in the barn until it becomes too cold for us, then we tuck her in and she goes to sleep. We check her regularly on the camera to make sure she is OK.
 
We replaced the large igloo with one that is smaller and won’t feel as empty. We put some of our clothes in there for familiar scent and lots of straw. She has been very tired and yesterday she wouldn’t eat her hay or broccolini (which is not normal at all), but we were able to get some grass hay pellets, pumpkin seeds, apple cider vinegar water, cabbage, flax seeds, a tiny bit of organic no sugar peanut butter and little organic popcorn down her.
 
Pumpkin and Cookie were inseparable! Never did they let the other out of their sight! If one went around a corner, the other would cry out loudly and in a panic to find the other! They grazed together, napped together, took sun-baths together, slept together and ate together. Though Cookie was mostly in charge, even when she was done grazing, she graciously layed down and waited for Pumpkin to finish. They were partners, best friends and sisters (not by blood), together 24×7. Pumpkin is lost. There are NO others like this DYNAMIC DUO! We are beside ourselves in GRIEF!
 
We knew one would eventually pass before the other, but we had NO idea it would happen this soon! So now we are faced with looking for another companion for her to snuggle with and take adventures with. There is NO OTHER like Cookie! She can’t be replaced! And bringing another goat onto our property is very scary to us! Pumpkin is our baby and we will take every precaution to get the healthiest, friendliest buddy possible. We will also make sure SHE is happy with the goat and do what SHE wants. We will keep you all informed.
 
Thank you all for allowing us to share our Cookie and thank you for showing us how much you care! She was SO SPECIAL! Our hearts are BROKEN FOREVER! Please keep Pumpkin and us in your thoughts and prayers.
 
With completely broken hearts,
 
Sherri and Wayne
Happy Mother's Day Mom

Mom, I Love You to Infinity and Beyond!

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I used to tell my mom, “I love you to infinity” and she would reply “and BEYOND” (and visa versa). I will cherish this sweet voice mail from my mom forever!

My mom was a loving, caring mom to my sister, brother and me! Though we all had challenges in this life, we remained very close, good friends! My mom struggled with chronic illness since the early 90’s.

In 2011, she was diagnosed with Lung Cancer! Then my brother passed away about 10 months later. The whole family has been beyond devastated! Then my sister got Cancer and went through a horrible battle. We hung onto each other tightly, as all three of us were grieving and fighting for our lives!

When Mom was first diagnosed, she was was given a year to live, IF she lived through the surgery and treatment (which we know without a doubt she would not have). We agreed none of us were ready to lose her to surgery and treatments and life in a nursing home, so we chose to take some alternative measures. Mom didn’t want my sister and me to lose her after we lost my brother, so she fought hard!

For 5 years, she had many close calls, she was unable to care for her own daily needs for months at a time, had lots of visits to the ER and help with rides, shopping, cooking and cleaning. Thankfully, she did have small windows of times in between her treatments when she could heat up her own food and drive a little bit. The last 3 1/2 years were extremely difficult, painful and full of constant crisis, close calls, hospitals, nursing homes, assisted livings and finally in Hospice.

This recording was from when she was in Porter Hospice for 4 1/2 months. We are so thankful she had a couple months there where she was really enjoying life the best she could, sitting in her favorite place in the living room and enjoying a beautiful garden right outside her doors! This voicemail was left when we had just had the alarms on her chair turned off for a month and she was FREE to move about in her room! She was puttering around, organizing things and talking on the phone. I am so grateful for the short time my mom had to enjoy her last days at Porter, before she had to go!

Soon after this voicemail, she went down hill.  Below is a short video of us sharing our “Infinity and Beyond” just a few days before she passed on. 

Mom, you fought an incredible fight and have suffered so long.  I miss you beyond words and I LOVE YOU TO INFINITY AND BEYOND! Forever and ever and ever!

Buddy Smiling

Thank You for Being My Friend

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This week, I lost my sweet friend, Buddy. He was a gorgeous, incredible, loving, smart and fun horse. My heart is broken. I knew it was coming, but I guess I had hoped he would be with us for one more Summer.

I already miss looking out my back window to make sure he is OK and see how he’s doing. I miss asking him to smile and spoiling him with apples and carrots! He was one in a million!

But most of all, I hurt for my dear friend and neighbor, Crystal. She has had Buddy most of his life. They had a once in a lifetime bond; he was her best friend and companion.

When he was diagnosed with cancer, Crystal put up a sign in his barn that said, “How Wonderful Life Is While You’re in the World.”

She lived each day enjoying every moment they had together and worked hard at giving him everything he needed to have the best and longest life possible. … And she dreaded the day she would have to say goodbye. 

Buddy, thank you for being such an amazing fur-baby and for taking such good care of Crystal all of these years. You gave her life so much meaning and unconditional love. Now, watch over her from above and run pain free through the clouds! We will miss you, my friend! 

Bill-and-Jane

The World Lost a Spectacular Person

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Jane Brown with her husband, Bill Cooper

Last week, I lost an incredible friend, Jane Brown. I knew her for 12 years, but my husband, Wayne, knew her even longer when he worked with her at Qwest Communications (now Comcast).

I am so devastated Jane is no longer with us on this planet. This world was definitely a much better place with her in it! She was a spectacular person unlike anyone I have ever known! She was smart, beautiful, funny, caring, giving and feisty! Jane was an amazing friend I could call and know I would not be met with judgment, but love, compassion, understanding … and possibly a swift kick in the pants if I was letting someone’s words get me down!

Jane earned a J.D. from Pepperdine University School of Law and an LLM from Washington University in St. Louis School of Law. She started her career working for various law firms and then as a corporate tax attorney for Fidelity Union Life insurance Company. Jane spent eight years as a government staff attorney with the Office of  Legislative Legal Services. Her most recent position was with Qwest as Senior Sourcing Manager. In 2007, she had to leave her career due to Multiple Sclerosis.

Like most of us, Jane was devastated after losing her career. Wayne called her and told her about the Invisible Disabilities Association. Jane was reluctant to check it out, but she had told Wayne she would, so she did. She joined the Invisible Disabilities online Community and started talking with other members about her loss and new life. Soon after, she joined the welcome committee where new members were met with open arms and listening ear.

One day, Jane asked me if we could open a Chat Room. I told her that it would require someone to moderate it, so if she was willing to do that, we would set one up! She was unsure of what it would all entail, but jumped in anyway! Jane quickly became a novice and reached out to thousands of people with her big heart and quippy wit! She was a HOOT! Everyone LOVED Jane and flocked to her chats!

In 2009, Jane decided she would venture out even more and see if she could meet someone she could have coffee with. So, she established a local Meetup group called, Disabled people want to meetup too! for people living with disabilities. She provided leadership for weekly coffees and other special events such as annual picnics, adaptive kayaking and Holiday dinners. The group quickly grew and has over 500 members today! Jane continued to be active in her group for many, many years, until she was no longer able to attend.

In 2011, Jane was awarded the Invisible Disabilities Association’s Volunteer Award for the work she did through IDA’s community, chatroom and her Meetup. Jane was humbled by the award, but she deserved it! Because of her, hundreds of people found new friendships and family! Video below. 

Thank you, Jane, for blessing me with your friendship! I will see you again. But I don’t know how I will get through this life without knowing you are just a phone call away. I miss you!

Jane received her award at 11 minutes into the video.

Carole tada

Celebrating the Life of My Mom, Carole!

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Let’s celebrate my amazing mom’s life! Not only was she a great mom, but an incredible business and people person who reached out to others with love and a caring heart!

Carole loved music! She was dancing in the crib, before she could walk, earning her the nickname, “Paddlefoot” from her Daddy. She danced around the house, doing her chores and even wore her tap shoes to school! She went to Cahokia High School in Illinois, where she played the French horn in the band and was the Prom Queen her Senior year. Carole went to college at Southern Illinois University, where Carole the dancer met Ron the musician.  Carole and Ron were married in 1955 and had three children.

Later, my mom, brother, sister and I moved to Colorado. My mom was a wonderful, loving mother who was always there for her children. She was also “Mom” to all of our friends and everyone in the neighborhood! My mom worked very hard to give her three children a good life. She was a successful clothing merchandiser, model, radio advertising salesperson and retail manager in a man’s world. What’s more, my mom had a passion for people and reached out to make a difference in the lives of others, no matter where she went.

When she retired, she used her business and people skills when she founded a very successful organization called, The Breakfast Club Singles 50+. Her personal touch set the groundwork for the popularity and reputation of this club, as she talked to countless single, widowed and divorced people for many hours on the TBC phone line, inviting them to the breakfasts and greeting them at the door with a giant smile and hug! With the help of her amazing TBC team, it grew to over 700 members and even more chapters opened up in Colorado, adding more and more events and activities!

Mom was also on the Executive Board of the Invisible Disabilities Association (IDA). She was their biggest champion, lending wonderful ideas, inspiration and excitement to the board. She loved to share their message of awareness, education and support for millions living with illness, pain and disability to everyone she met, right up until the last weeks of her life.

Though Mom was very successful in her career and her non-profit work, Carole’s family, children, grandchildren and great grandchildren were her most cherished accomplishments!

Mom fought a very long, difficult and painful battle with cancer for eight and a half years. Yet, even when she was ill and struggling, she was known for taking someone’s hand and thanking them for caring for her, followed by blowing them a big kiss on their way out the door!

Despite her loving, giving, selfless demeanor, she was the most tenacious and determined person we have ever known, far surpassing any prognosis ever given. Her faith remained strong and she would be the first to tell you that “only by the grace of God” could she do it. Mom may not be with us physically on this earth anymore, but she will always be in our hearts, encouraging us all to by example to reach out to others, no matter where you are in life.

My mom graduated from this life to a glorious one with God in Heaven with my brother, Jim, her parents, sister, niece and precious doggy, Mopsy. She passed on 09-09-2019 at 09:09 AM.

We would like to extend a SPECIAL THANK YOU for making the “Celebrate Life” services spectacular!  Thank you, The Ambassador of Soul, Biff Gore, Chaplain Jeff Vankooten, Soquel Ross, the Invisible Disabilities Association, The Breakfast Club Singles 50+, Highline Community Church, Hefelbower Funeral Services and Porter Hospice Residences, as well as all of the incredible friends and family who attended our celebration, sent cards and/or donations to the Invisible Disabilities Association In Memory of Carole Mitchell! 

Mom, I already miss you beyond words! But you fought an incredible fight and have suffered so long. Fly free my precious best friend! I love you to infinity and BEYOND! Forever and ever and ever!

Sherri

MORE VIDEOS BELOW!

Mom and I had a cute saying we shared. I captured it the last week of her life.

Mom jokes about how someone must have stolen her ice cream, because it was gone!

Mom and me enjoying listening to the song she used to love to sing to me.

Biff Gore singing to my mom. www.BiffGore.com

Biff Gore singing to my mom. www.BiffGore.com

VIDEO CREDITS: All rights and credits for videos belong to Sherri Connell. All rights and credits for music in the videos belong to the songwriters and artists given on each video description on YouTube. Videos were created for the sole purpose of celebrating Carole’s life.

 

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Thank you, everyone!
Carole at Porter Hospice Residences

We Are So Grateful for Porter Hospice Residences!

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Carole at Porter Hospice Residences at the Johnson Center
Mom got to see the waterfall up close! She was so happy!
We finally got my Mom, Carole, outside for a few minutes to see the waterfall in the garden! To look at her in this picture, you would have no idea how much she has been through and how much she deeply suffers daily. But she asked for a little lipstick and flashed a quick smile so we could capture the happiness in her heart … a photo I will cherish for many years to come! 
 
It has been a very arduous road, as my mom has battled lung cancer for eight years! The past couple of years have been a formidable and agonizing fight, with many close calls and crisis after crisis. But now she faces the final chapter. Please pray she does not suffer much more in this life, before the Lord takes her home.

Thank you, Porter Hospice At The Johnson Center, for loving my mom and making her feel so special and important in the last few pages of her life here on earth!
 
Everyone has been so caring, helpful and amazing! My mom is finally at peace, knowing she is not alone, because not only does she have her family and friends, but now she also has her Porter Hospice Team, who have become her family, too! This is a gift in which we will be forever grateful!
 
After seeing the waterfall, Mom is sound asleep!
It takes very strong, yet compassionate people to work in a Hospice environment. May God bless you and your families for the time, sacrifice and heartache you all face daily. We are so very honored and thankful to have our mom in your care!
 

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Thank you, everyone!

Saying Goodbye to a Good Friend

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With a heavy heart, I share that my dear friend, Ann left this world last night. I rejoice that she is pain free, with God, her son, her dad and brother.

I am also thankful for the birthday party friends and family had for her in May. 100 people were there, standing in line to share their love for Ann. We gave her a tiara, boa and beads to make her feel like a queen! It was absolutely beautiful!

A special THANK YOU goes out to Jim Juhl, Gwen Juhl, June Greiman, Ali Fisher, the women’s group and choir and South Suburban Church for the amazing celebration!

Please keep her husband, daughter, siblings and mom in your prayers. May God bring them peace beyond comprehension. I love you, Ann! Thank you for being a blessing in my life. 💜💜💜

Drive In Dinner with Snickers

You Were Definitely Momma’s Girl

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My precious baby, you were so special! You were definitely Momma’s girl, right down to healthy eating habits!

I miss you SO MUCH, little monkey!

 Momma

 

We Lost Our Baby Snickers

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I have extremely heartbreaking news! Our baby Snickers went to Heaven in the middle of the night. She had a catastrophic stroke, most likely from the probable tumor in her brain that has been causing seizures and some neurological issues.

As many of you know, she wasn’t supposed to live more than a few days in November 2014. She wasn’t eating, her heart rate was 200 and she had a fatal heart condition, with Epilepsy. But I didn’t want to give up yet. I put supplements in a syringe and force fed her with them and she started walking and eating again. Then I made her fresh meats and vegetables. She has needed a ton of hands on care around the clock, including constant feeding since then. Nonetheless, she was happy, eating, wagging her tail and running around like a puppy. In fact, we had to slow her down most of the time!

Anyhow, several people have commented that they noticed we have been through a lot lately. I don’t want to be negative, but it has been unbelievable! The past few years alone, we have had constant crisis after death after crisis after death. 7 deaths, Mom and sister with cancer, 3 more family members really struggling and major crisis situations, in addition to my broken ankle (which a year later is still not totally healed), as well as recent flu, bronchial pneumonia and current torn ribs.

And now, my baby Snickers is gone. I am thankful for the time we had! But Mommy misses you SOOO much! Goodbye for now, my sweet little monkey! Thank you for bringing love and laughter into my life!

 Mommy

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